


Momijigari

by inelegantly (Lir)



Series: SWAG 2016 Fills [6]
Category: Hikaru no Go
Genre: Canon Compliant, Character Study, Gen, Introspection, Memorials, Tributes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-02
Updated: 2016-02-02
Packaged: 2018-05-17 17:04:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5878699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lir/pseuds/inelegantly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Throughout the years they spend together, Hikaru and Sai develop a habit of going to watch the fall leaves turn together. After Sai is gone, Hikaru continues with momijigari as a way of honoring Sai's memory.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Momijigari

**Author's Note:**

> The prompt this fic was written from was: "Sai teaching hikaru old ways of doing things before he leaves and hikaru doing them after sai has left to remember him."
> 
> I went with momijigari, or "the Japanese tradition of visiting areas where leaves have turned red in the autumn" as something "old" Sai could have conceivably taught Hikaru to do because it's a pastime that dates back as far as the Heian era while still being practiced in the modern day — not dissimilarly from how Go continues to be played. I really enjoyed writing this because I like writing character pieces, and it's just as much a study of Sai and Hikaru's relationship as it is of either of them alone.

-

The first fall while Sai is with Hikaru, Hikaru isn't interested in any of his old-fashioned wisdom. 

Sai is too willing to give it, when they're staring down at a Go board or at one of Hikaru's history tests. But outside those times, Sai isn't so rooted to the past, either. He's far more likely to marvel at the opening of an umbrella or the motion of an elevator, or to look up at the sky and express wonder over how men may have gone among those stars. 

Their first year is about new beginnings, when to each other, each of them is the newest thing of all. 

-

The second fall while Sai is with Hikaru, his eyes light up at the descent of the first autumn leaves. 

He presses Hikaru about Momijigari, begging of him please, please, can't they go and watch the leaves change? Won't Hikaru witness with him the beauty of the maple trees, dropping the burden of their foliage where people might watch the colors swirling on the breeze? Hikaru tells him that it's a pastime for old men, it's boring, he doesn't want to waste his time looking at _trees_ when he could be playing Go.

But Sai only laughs, and asks him, hadn't Hikaru said once that Go was for old men, too? 

Hikaru can only huff at that, left with no retort in the face of his own, thoughtless words. 

Their second year is about changes, about growth being made and things left behind, about the shifting of seasons within human lives as well as the ones depicted through the colors of leaves upon the trees.

-

The third fall while Sai is with Hikaru, Hikaru is a pro Go player, with little time for viewing leaves. 

But Sai tugs at his arm and wheedles by his ear, making the most contrite of pleading faces until Hikaru has no choice but to scoop up the stones and put the goban away. He has matches coming up, plans, stepping stones paving his future out before him and leading him inexorably toward tougher and tougher foes. Sai watches them unfold before Hikaru, as steady as stones being dropped into a lake — or as lightly settled as maple leaves drifting upon the water's surface. 

Hikaru takes Sai to Ginkgo Avenue, walking through Tokyo at the height of the leaves turning. 

Sai "ohhs" and "ahhs" at the changing leaves, as mystified by the subtle magic of the world as ever. Hikaru watches Sai, arms slung behind his head and posture relaxed as he weaves his way slowly between the other viewers come from far and wide to see the trees. They could be playing a game, but Hikaru cannot bring himself to argue with the peacefulness that comes from standing beside Sai in nature, a reflective contrast to the feeling of excitement inherent to fighting Sai from across the board. 

Their third year is about strength, about knowing when to display it, just as well as knowing when to allow hidden strength to speak out all on its own. 

-

The fourth fall, when Sai is no longer with Hikaru and while Hikaru is a pro Go player, he doesn't want to think of leaves at all. 

Sai is gone, and though the pain no longer aches quite so deeply within Hikaru's chest, it is an absence he never loses awareness of. Every so often he will catch himself staring down at the goban and wondering what insight Sai might have now, or what move Sai might have made then. He knows Sai as intimately as he's known anyone in his life, through the poetry that was his play and the nobility that was his character. Sometimes he wonders what Sai would have thought, or done, but not without realizing that the knowledge is not lost.

Sai lives on within him, echoes of his Go rippling out from every stone that Hikaru plays. In years past, Hikaru might have hated this, hated that he was performing a task that could never truly be his own. As a young pro working to establish himself as a player, performing moves Sai would have been proud of feels less like imitation and more as a form of honoring his memory. 

Hikaru doesn't want to think of leaves, but as the days turn closer to the peak of the season, he knows his feet will carry him again to Ginkgo Avenue. 

Hikaru stands beneath the trees, not moving, allowing the foot traffic to pass about him without interruption just as he allows the leaves to fall from the branches without his interference. They pass in front of him in flurries of color as well as drift across the ground, forming great, bright heaps along the walkway which nevertheless slowly fade and turn to brown. It's reassuring, feeling the passage of time in such a painless way.

It's so different, from the heat that consumes him when he plays in his pro matches, knowing that as hard as he is fighting, he cannot let Akira fight harder, cannot slack off in his quest to catch up to his rival. 

Hikaru's fourth year as a Go player is about affirmations. Though he's walked many steps of the path toward professionalism with Sai's steady company matching him stride for stride, each step he takes into the future now is a step made by him, and him alone. There's something frightening, about being in charge of his own destiny — but something exciting, too, as challenging as an empty board presented to him as he seats himself across from a strong opponent. 

Hikaru's fourth year is about affirmations, but his fifth will be about commitment. He's married himself to a way of life going back countless centuries, and as certain as Hikaru is that he will never stop playing Go, he's certain he'll keep viewing the autumn leaves, too — as a form of renewing his dedication, and paying his respects to Sai and the traditions they come from. 

-

-


End file.
